New insanity of mine.

Hummel figurines.

things that I've learned...

1. I can't take it when other people scream/yell/insult the people I love. I'm not going to take it sitting down.
2. Other people can be really gentle, nice & sweet on the facade but boy oh boy, they can get REALLY nasty too. To the point where, they just humiliate themselves and infect the people around with trauma and sadness.
3. Communication does not involve yelling, AT ALL.
4. One must learn to breathe, chill out & let go. Life's too short to get caught up with every small stuff and future tripping.

a REALLY fun day at the lake

change

with my layout. again.

it's almost June.

time for an update.

why don't you just say what you need to say???

As Ger & I were driving on our way home from an early dinner with his friend Stuart & his wife, I was browsing on some stations on XM Satellite that my BIL has in his car. I found John Mayer's Song "Say What You Need To Say" while the chorus was being played, I really like that song, an image of Kristi Yamaguchi and Mark Ballas comes to my head dancing the Rumba.

Then Ger just made this comment, "Oh, that's very creative, say what you need to say, say what you need to say... can't he think of any other lyrics?"

It didn't stop there, "I can even sing this song, all I have to do is say what I need to say. This guy is drunk!"

And he really did start singing.
I just lost it and laughed like crazy.

Until the song finished, the image of Mark & Kristi dancing the Rumba was immediately replaced by Ger belting the song out loud.

In fairness, he was correct, for the most part of the song it's all "say what you need to say" is all you can hear. Here's the lyrics (do let me know how many times it's being said):

Take all of your wasted honor.
Every little past frustration.
Take all of your so called problems,
Better put 'em in quotations.

Say what you need to say (x8)

Walkin' like a one man army,
Fightin' with the shadows in your head.
Livin' up the same old moment
Knowin' you'd be better off instead

If you could only...Say what you need to say (x8)

Have no fear for givin' in.
Have no fear for giving over.
You better know that in the end
It's better to say too much, than never to say what you need to say again.

Even if your hands are shaking,
And your faith is broken.
Even as the eyes are closin',
Do it with a heart wide open.

Say what you need to say (x7)

Say what you need to, Say what you need to...

Say what you need to say.

Who ever said Global Warming isn't true, think again!

So we're here in Arizona. Phoenix area. This is got to be the weirdest summer ever. Ger & I were expecting scorching hot summer days. Instead, it's been really cold, windy and pouring rain.

At this time of year, it's supposed to be in the 100's here in Phoenix, instead, it's so cool. Not that we're complaining. But I thought I came prepared, flip flops, tank tops, shorts. Wrong. I should have brought sneakers, hoodies and something to keep me warm.

Oh well. On the plus side, I won't be compelled to wear two-piece swimsuits.

Silently freakin' out...

UPDATE : I made it through the whole shift without freakin' out and I can say, modesty aside, that I did well. Wooot! Wooot!

***

Really. No kidding.

Remember this crazy Saturday at work? Well, today will be my second Saturday-rush-hour shift since that Saturday I mentioned.

Hopefully this time, I'm armed and more knowledgeable than I was then.

The last thing I need right now is a déja vu!

Happy birthday toooooo me...

Well, that was a month ago but with the birthday gift I had waited for, is sooooo totally worth it.



Thanks, Ger.

You should see the look on his face when he asked me, "So is this what I'll be buying you for your birthday or Christmas from now on?". Priceless!

And I got myself this wallet and this swing bag at the outlet. The prices were a steal.

**image credits to the eBayers**

Resisting the urge to scream out of frustration

4:oo pm - When nobody could give me any concrete answer of where we're going and what we'll be doing today, I told Ger that I want to go to the mall. He said "Sure, I'll take you".

4:20 pm - Ger said they'll drop me off the mall while MIL and him go get some errands done and we'll probably go to Hillsburg.

5:20 pm - MIL has decided to go to movies instead of the errands. Movie starts at 7:oo pm.

5:30 pm - Ger now wants me to hurry up so we could get to the mall and be back in time to go see the movie. Around this time, I was already upset. What the heck?!?! Didn't I just tell him a while ago that I wanted to go to the mall and I don't want any pressure.

6:05 pm - We got to Santa Rosa Mall. Ger gave me 20 MINUTES to get the things that I wanted. WHO THE HECK GOES SHOPPING FOR 20 MINUTES?!?!? I kept telling him that and I know it isn't his fault, it's nobody's fault. But why was I now the one pigeon holed into this situation when I clearly laid out my plan an hour ago. Ger knows that if there's one thing that I LOATHE most, it's being rushed.

6:30 pm - After almost running around the mall like some sort of a headless chicken. We were on our way home. There was a bit of remaining Bay-Area-after-rush-hour traffic. At this point Ger was uncertain if they'll make the movie. But it's just showing in Oakmont, like 3 minutes away from where MIL lives.

6:50 pm - We made it home. Just in time for the movie. And as luck would have it, MIL now decides she didn't want to go watch the movie after all.

Everybody now say, "Great!!!". With a hint of frustration and sarcasm.

Ger now suggests that he will just get the yogurt after all (that errand I was talking about). MIL says she doesn't need it.

I think I've set the world record for shortest shopping time. Who in the book of leisure shopping history does that?!?!?!

I still managed to get an antibacterial lotion, a lip gloss, Winnie the Pooh fleece blanket, Winnie the Pooh journal and a black cropped pants I can wear to work. Oh and some weird stares that clearly says, "why the heck is she running around the mall?!"

Trust me, I was not happy about it, the rushed shopping that is.

Tomorrow is when we're going back to Fallon. I already told Ger even before coming to Santa Rosa, CA that I want to stop at both Petaluma Premium Outlets and Vacaville Premium Outlets. I want to get a birthday present for myself (quite late, I know but I wanted to get something I really like). Patience isn't my cup of tea, if I had waited this long, it means I REALLY wanted to get something that means to me.

He said we'll do it on our way home and we pretty much planned to leave early so I can get into the outlets with a lot of time to shop and not be pressured, unlike what happened at the mall.

You could say, I could shop when we get to Nevada or next time around. I waited WEEKS to get something for me on my birthday. That's what happens when you live in a small town where the only place you can get something is WalMart and Safeway. NO MALLS, at all. Reno is about an hour and 20 minutes away. So when is next time around, really? When we're back in the countryside, we have jobs waiting for us and with my crazy schedule, who knows when we'll get the chance to just go shopping in Reno.

And just about 2 hours ago, Ger told me that the plans may slightly change because he has to go get some yogurt because MIL needs it and some other errands to ran too.

Again, everybody say. "Great!!!!!". Now, with more than a hint of sarcasm and frustration

Let me see how much I do with these...

1. Take a 10-30 minute walk every day. And while you walk, smile. It is the ultimate anti-depressant.
2. Sit in silence for at least 10 minutes each day.
3. Buy a DVR and tape your late night shows and get more sleep.
4. When you wake up in the morning complete the following statement, ‘My purpose is to __________ today.’
5. Live with the 3 E’s — Energy, Enthusiasm, and Empathy.
6. Play more games and read more books than you did in 2007.
7. Make time to practice meditation, and prayer. They provide us with daily fuel for our busy lives.
8. Spend time with people over the age of 70 and under the age of 6.
9. Dream more while you are awake.
10. Eat more foods that grow on trees and plants and eat less food that is manufactured in plants.
11. Drink green tea and plenty of water. Eat blueberries, wild Alaskan salmon, broccoli, almonds & walnuts.
12. Try to make at least three people smile each day.
13. Clear clutter from your house, your car, your desk and let new and flowing energy into your life.
14. Don’t waste your precious energy on gossip, OR issues of the past, negative thoughts or things you cannot control. Instead invest your energy in the positive present moment.
15. Realize that life is a school and you are here to learn. Problems are simply part of the curriculum that appear and fade away like algebra class but the lessons you learn will last a lifetime.
16. Eat breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince and dinner like a college kid with a maxed out charge card.
17. Smile and laugh more. It will keep the nagative blues away.
18. Life isn’t fair, but it’s still good.
19. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.
20. Don’t take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
21. You don’t have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.
22. Make peace with your past so it won’t spoil the present.
23. Don’t compare your life to others’. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
24. No one is in charge of your happiness except you.
25. Frame every so-called disaster with these words: ‘In five years, will this matter?’
26. Forgive everyone for everything.
27. What other people think of you is none of your business.
28. Remember God heals everything.
29. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
30. Your job won’t take care of you when you are sick. Your friends will. Stay in touch.
31. Get rid of anything that isn’t useful, beautiful or joyful.
32. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
33. The best is yet to come.
34. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
35. Do the right thing!
36. Call your family often.
37. Each night before you go to bed complete the following statements: I am thankful for _______. Today I accomplished ____.
38. Remember that you are too blessed to be stressed.
39. Enjoy the ride. Remember this is not Disney World and you certainly don’t want a fast pass. You only have one ride through life so make the most of it and enjoy the ride.
40. Laugh when you can, apologize when you should, and let go of what you can’t change.

just before I doze off...

I had to wake up early this morning for work. It was a busy busy day. I was exhausted half-way through my shift. It's probably because I slept really late after working until 9:45pm last night.

After work, I went home and took a nap, then woke up and pack for California.

7 hours later, I'm sitting in my mother-in-law's guest bedroom, still tired and exhausted.

But it's good to be in California even for just a couple of days. I could use a break from the nasty wind and dust we've had in Nevada.

Bits & Pieces...

I'm pondering on a decision that I am going to make. It will be a life changing decision and involves real hard work. I'm really praying if it's meant for me. I just don't think I'll be able to survive boot camp, that's what's freaking me out.

***

Work is still work but it's fine. I have a Cold Beverage Training tomorrow morning and then have to work in the evening, closing shift.
I hope my workmate Andrea will get her approval to switch sched with Court so I can switch shift with her too. I need to get off work early this Friday so we could have an early start driving to California to visit MK for Mother's Day.

***

Why the heck does my shoulder hurts?

puhlease spare me the drama.

One of my workmate once told me, "When there's a bunch of people, there's bound to be drama".

Boy, was she right.

At work, I try to keep to myself and focus on what I should be doing and I only take instructions from my supervisor because if I listen to everybody, I'd go nuts!

Anyway, I had a taste of the drama earlier tonight. This girl slammed the whipped cream container real hard on the sink, where I was standing, minding my own business. She did it so loud that I jumped.

It took every ounce of strength from my body not to snap her.

I was thinking, why the heck would she do that to me? Did she just "accidentally" placed it THAT loud? Or was she pissed because she was talking and I didn't pay attention (because at that moment, the ice maker is SO loud and the water was running and I honestly thought she wasn't talking to me)?
Even so. She has no reason, excuse and even an inch of right to do that. She's lucky I was in my Zen-like mood.

I just have to vent here because I don't want to sound like a whiner at work.

I may be this "new" Asian girl who's minding her own business and going about what's supposed to be done, but I don't want anybody to think that they can walk all over me just like that, because if they think that, then they need to watch out for thorns.

ramblings of a full stomach

Argh!

I'm pissed and irritated at Chikka's lousy system. I'm trying to log in using the Chikka that I downloaded and I can't seem to get through. THEN I tried logging in through their website and still the same thing.