A letter to no one

Dear You,

Words cannot express how much disappointed I am with you and with the situation.
As much as I understand how things aren't under your control, I also realize that you at least have a control of not letting me down.

It was all for fun. It was all for good times. It was a time away from all the stress that you and I are both experiencing. It was for us to unwind, eat our emotions and laugh the troubles away.

So when you gave me the idea of a quick escape, I gladly let my guard down.

It wasn't easy. There were second thoughts, there was this too much self control that I do, which is to prevent myself from disappointment.

I've told you that you better be sure. I've asked you if it was just an impulsive offer due to some uncontrollable emotions on your part. You assured me that it was neither and I trusted you.

We once had this conversation, break my trust once and that's all it take to severe trust and friendship.

I do understand how complicated the situation is. Trust me, I mean no harm and believe me when I say that I am truly here for you and that I care about you, maybe more that you do for me.

But I can't be this friend whose emotions gets toyed with every time shit happens with you. Times when you want to feel needed, valued and validated, I don't want to be your "next option". Don't get me wrong, I do value the friendship that we have. But please, don't use me as an escape to your reality.

I am writing this because it is the only release I have. I do mean what I said, I am not going to talk to you beyond necessary.

Thank you for everything.

I truly wish you all the happiness, the true happiness and true love you deserve.

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